Thank God for Insurance.

[xp_roulette]

So, the dentist fixed the tooth that got cracked in half when the super-strong nigh-invulnerable guy punched me in the face with his sword. It's fantastic, I can't feel the left side of my face.

Unfortunately, the receptionist also gave me a concerned look and slipped me a pamphlet to the local battered women's shelter. I don't think she bought my usual cover story of "I'm really into cage fighting." I'm probably going to have to come up with a new one.

Comments

[x-bishop.livejournal.com]

Perhaps you should actually become a cage fighter...

[x-wildchild.livejournal.com]

It's not as much fun as it sounds. Okay, I mean, okay, TOAD, but I had broken ribs for days. It sucked.

[x-roulette.livejournal.com]

Considering I basically do that already...

[x-bishop.livejournal.com]

Exactly. I'll be your trainer and you'll take the world by storm.

[x-roulette.livejournal.com]

Sweet. I've always wanted to add world conquest to my many list of skills.

[x-wildchild.livejournal.com]

Women's lacrosse. Have you ever watched that? TOTALLY BRUTAL.

[x-roulette.livejournal.com]

Or rugby. Girls play rugby.

Full contact ultimate frisbee?

[x-snowflake.livejournal.com]

Yeah, remember that time I got a concussion on that filing cabinet? People acted really stupid about it.

Actually, everyone acted really stupid about that. Our lesson: People are stupid.

[x-roulette.livejournal.com]

Yeah. This I know so very well. At least it doesn't hurt to chew anymore.

[x-snowflake.livejournal.com]

Well, good dental hygiene is apparently part of a healthy lifestyle. I was reading that on some website the other day, anyway; although probably it wasn't talking about people punching you in the face. Which is kind of a big gap in most literature, actually. It's not like it doesn't happen on a regular basis, there is no reason not to include it.

[x-roulette.livejournal.com]

It's because people like to pretend that everything is hugs and puppies all the time and aren't willing to admit that sometimes, life just sucks.

[x-wither.livejournal.com]

Normally I think you're supposed to stay far enough away from the guy with the sword so that he can't hit you with the sword, nevermind punch you. You missed that lesson, huh?

[x-roulette.livejournal.com]

You know, in my defense, it wasn't like I leaped into his arms and demanded her punch me.

[x-wither.livejournal.com]

If he grabbed you then you still failed the distance lesson, huh? I'll just add this to my "List of Reasons to Never Even Consider the Team"

[x-roulette.livejournal.com]

The rat bastard was super-strong and fast, he WAS on the other side of the room.

[x-wither.livejournal.com]

I don't believe you, but I'm going to pretend I do. I'd offer you waffles but I assume eating isn't something you'd be doing too well with at the moment.

[x-roulette.livejournal.com]

Since the novacaine wore off and the painkillers kicked in, I'm all yours.

[x-wither.livejournal.com]

I may be slightly shoddier company than I was the last time, actually. But I think you earned waffles anyway.

[x-roulette.livejournal.com]

You spoil me.

[x-wither.livejournal.com]

I'm pretty sure somewhere in the friend contract there's a stipulation that says it's my duty to spoil you with waffles until you have someone in a position which has higher spoiling requirements such as a boyfriend or manservant.

[x-roulette.livejournal.com]

Boyfriend and manservant? Aren't they the same thing?

[x-wither.livejournal.com]

Remind me to never, ever date you. Not that it was ever likely to happen, but just in case.

[x-roulette.livejournal.com]

Awwww.

[x-wither.livejournal.com]

Don't "Awww" me. I fail for manservant. My attention span wanders away too often. One day we'll buy you a slave and then all your dreams will come true.

[x-roulette.livejournal.com]

How about we just get me waffles, ne?

[x-wither.livejournal.com]

Waffles, right. Post haste, er, or whatever.

[x-forge.livejournal.com]

I would like to point out that this is yet another time I have faced near-certain death and come out unscathed. Why do we consider you the lucky one again?

[x-roulette.livejournal.com]

I don't freaking know!

[x-cable.livejournal.com]

Good Lord, don't tempt fate like that...

[x-forge.livejournal.com]

See, maybe you've forgotten what it was like to be young and awesome, but hey - the new generation seems to be kicking some butt. As self-designated spokesman, I think that perhaps some of the, er, more venerable of our comrades might benefit from some more rest and clean living.

[x-cable.livejournal.com]

You'll never hear me impugning the abilities of the new generation. And venerable is a nice word. I could live with being venerable. Also with more rest and clean living, but on that score I'm not holding my breath.

[x-desperado.livejournal.com]

I had the Big Red Bastard throwing rocks at my head for an hour. I feel your pain.

[x-roulette.livejournal.com]

See, you're semi-invulnerable, right? I don't know why they always end up after me, I tend to go squish when hit.

[x-desperado.livejournal.com]

Still hurts.

[x-pete.livejournal.com]

Yeah, he wasn't a lot of fun, was he. He ruined my fucking suit. The thing with the strong and the quick is that nine times out of ten, they really don't know what they're doing, because they've never had to learn to fight properly. That fucker kind of did, but it wasn't impossible to distract him by doing two things at once, I assume because his braincell couldn't cope with thinking of more than one thing itself. Didn't actually help when it came to actually putting him down, what with the fucking invulnerability, but but every second I spent hitting him was another one where he wasn't trying to put the overgrown knitting needle through me.

I know you see Wanda for powers training, but who've you got teaching you to fight?

[x-roulette.livejournal.com]

I wound up making a lucky guess and got him to stop what he was doing, and then Christian hit him with a crane.

But in all honesty, I rather someone not be able to sneak up on me like that again. I've got pretty standard fight training. But after the SECOND round with a super-strong invulnerable guy, I'm open for way more.

[x-pete.livejournal.com]

Next time you're by to see Wanda, stop in and see me. I don't want to step on anyone's toes, and I know that what you leather-wearing types train for is emphatically not what I do, but I'm probably one of a very small number of people round these parts who spends time studying dance as a means of making sure I don't get the crap beaten out of me.